Jeff and I have had some sweet morning time lately. We got a kitty, Charlie. Jeff gets up a bit earlier than I do to feed him and then I meet them in our front room where there is a big window and a pretty view. While Charlie sits on a bench in front of the window watching the butterflies and birds, Jeff and I sit on the couch, enjoying our family time, reading and listening to the Bible. Recently, God revealed Himself in a new way that deepened our understanding of Him, each other, marriage, and relationships in general.
In case you don't already know the story about the prophet Hosea, God told him to "Go and marry a prostitute, so that some of her children will be conceived in prostitution" (vs1:2 NLT). Yep, you read that right! God often taught His people through a prophet's life. Hosea's story mirrored God's relationship with a rebellious people who would betray Him over and over again.
So Hosea married Gomer, and as predicted, she had children who were conceived in prostitution. The Lord said, name your daughter Lo-ruhamah—un-loved (vs6) and your son Lo-ammi—not my people (vs8). NowI know this seems harsh, but watch what God does.
Not realizing that all she had was from her husband, Gomer chased her lovers for what she thought she needed. God instructed Hosea to let her go. He does the same with us. He doesn't force Himself upon anyone and He definitely doesn't make anyone stay against their will. He will give you over to your desire, if you desire, but He does not stop pursuing you.
Gomer left—Hosea let her—God let her. He was allowing her to get to the end of herself; and she did (well mostly). Then, God said, "Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another man and is an adulteress" (vs3:1). Gomer was up for bid and Hosea paid the price to buy her back. Sound familiar? A picture of Jesus' redemption of man. We are saved by His grace. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we do (Eph. 2:8-9). Hosea brought Gomer back under his covering and protection but this time not as husband and wife. She still had her status, but intimacy was broken. Gomer had a choice to make, would she accept what Hosea offered—would she receive the covenant?
In Ephesians 5:25 we read, Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (NIV). We'll get a little deeper into this in our series in Ephesians, but for now, pay close attention to what Paul is saying here. Marriage, the way God intended it to be, is a picture of covenant. It's a covenant of covering. If a man commits to a covenant (with God) to cover His wife, then His wife will get everything she wants. But if he commits to her, over God, she is only going to get what he perceives she needs. Don't miss that.
This is challenging for us. I suppose it is for most. When Jeff and I entered into a covenant of marriage as we understood it, we committed to each other. Yes, we love God and wanted Him in the middle of our marriage, BUT our covenant was with each other. However, God always intended for our covenant to be with Him and He would to lead us to each other. His way doesn't seem to make sense, but again, look a little closer. God calls Jeff to cover me as part of his covenant with Him. My role, like Gomer, is to receive, or better yet, accept it.
Marriage is a physical example of the way Jesus loves His bride. He serves her—He washes her feet—He encourages her—He comforts her—He protects her—He sacrificed everything for her. If a man seeks God and loves his wife in this way, submitting to His leading will be a pleasure, as God intended. Submission is weakness in the eyes of the world, but in God's eyes, it's a sign of strength. Remember, Jesus submitted to His Father in everything. In marriage, God calls me to submit to Jeff in everything. So when differences enter in, and intimacy is broken, it's God we look to, not each other. It's our covenant with God that leads us.
". . . . And the two become one flesh. This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church (vs.31b,32 NIV).
Jesus paid the price for all mankind, but each must receive His gift, His covenant of covering. Marriage is a blessing, but it's just a picture.
You can stop serving God, worshipping Him, even loving Him—but you can't stop God from loving you. He tells His redemption story through a broken marriage, that because of His sacrifice, is made whole. Although we turn our backs on Him and worship other things, His redeeming love draws us back.
. . . . God says in the prophecy of Hosea,
“Those who were not my people, I will now call my people.And I will love those whom I did not love before.”
And,
“Then, at the place where they were told, ‘You are not my people,’there they will be called ‘children of the living God.’” (Rom 9:25-26 NLT)
Lo-ammi becomes Ammi (My people) and Lo-ruhamah becomes Ruhamah (Loved). His love doesn't depend on us, but intimacy does. Jesus paid the price for all mankind, but each must receive His gift, His covenant of covering. We spend so much time seeking each other in relationships; marriage, family, friendships. God never intended for us to strive to make relationships work. He says, "Imitate Me in everything you do."
Now, let's go back to Ephesians 5 for a moment. Before God (via Paul) even gets to the subject of marriage, He said, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ" (vs.21 NIV). Think of what the world would look like if we cared for others, in every relationship, as more important than ourselves. I heard it put this way—Love goes up, then out. He's the One who deserves our respect and He asks us to direct that respect toward one another. How does humankind arrive at the conclusion that they can do things better than God? Does the clay say to the potter, "Stop, you're doing it wrong?"
(see Isa.45:9)
God has given us everything we need, yet we strive for more. It's so exhausting. This is one of the reasons I believe God is leading us to Ephesians. The book is split in two. The first three chapters indicate what God has done for us, the second three, what we do in response. Honestly, we don't have the power to respond without first understanding our position. True power comes from above. Any other is just an illusion; it's fleeting.
Jesus redeems. Will you accept His covenant of covering? Will you allow Him to use you and to love through you?
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